i'm so tired

pfeiffer. white oleander is a really good movie. it's about artists.

awesome looks

Elvira Hancock!

is this from ladyhawke?

World's Most Bored Woman: Scarface's Wife.

she looks like a little duck.

my penpal james in california sent me a link w/ a note: please tell me you've heard of this band.

Me: Little Girls? nope..o. they are from Toronto, ON
so i had a lil listen
they're COOL. post-punk, minimal. i like that.

i suggest you listen to 'last call' and 'ebonics':

LITTLE GIRLS

today, on very little sleep, i did these things:
an all-day market and all the b.s. & work involved in that. read: MASS.

re-met a guy i had a crush on so long ago i could barely remember him. it took us 20 minutes to figure out how we knew each other. apparently i played him a TAPED interview w/ kurt cobain..so that takes us to 1993. what a trip. plus he knows my DAD??

in my attempt to remember, i did a thing that only i would do: an overly animated, dramatic gesture which involved (my) hands covering my eyes looking
downward and saying out loud:

"Oh my god. this is what happens when you get old".

(try to remember the thousands of people you have met in your lifetime. tens of thousands. for some: hundreds).

this is the kind of revelation that most would keep to themselves. For others, not (even) realize. (e.g: CLUED DUDE). i'm no good at self-censorship. can't hide anything.

said 'happy birthday' to my grandpa. He had a fall yesterday but he is okay. He skinned his knee and that he is not happy about the fall. It is very hard for me to compare phone call to phone call because each phone call is more faded than the last. It is very hard for me to hear this fading. But. he is a super trooper. He survived a heart operation last year (pig's valve) from which he had a 50/50 chance (he proclaimed: "I don't care!" (ya grandpa. now i know where i get it)). Today he is swimming and tending to his garden. He grows SWEET PEA flowers. It's heartbreaking, those sweet peas. He used to bring them around - a little bundle he would leave at the door. He liked to bake bread and deliver it to people. He likes to make big meals and have lots of people over to eat it. He is very generous that way. He is a hundred thousand things. O grandpa.

the market sucked the life force out of me but i had some nice social interactions. I talked to an acquaintance who is suffering a difficult break-up. I'm like this: TALK TO ME. i'm the PROFESSIONAL. don't hold back.

she said, 'wow. thank you so much. no one understands what i am going thru. no one i know can comprehend'.

i said, 'i know exactly what you are going through and i will always remember how it feels'

is it exact? no one knows exact..but i understand..everything she described and what i described back to her, she said, 'yes'.

true blood is OUT OF HAND this week. even in an exhausted state, i still managed to get on my bike and ride over to the HOME THEATRE of elisa rose's buds. ya.

o. back to my boring list.

-counted cash. makes no difference.
-got a small design job which needs to be done yesterday. my favourites.
-got a new scarf (cornflower blue w/ skulls head. they are subtle) from georgie girl.Hand And Shadow. we've known each other for over 30 years. her and I.

uh..i did a bunch of other stuff but i dont remember anymore. now i am so tired i can't sleep.
more kurt.

xo